Friday, December 21, 2007

Too much of anything bitter???

You know the sensation on our tongue when we've had too many sweets or too many chocolates. Gives you the feeling that you don't want to put even a lil more of that into your mouth. Gets bitter? Similarly many other things.... When you do too much of work, too much of travelling, too much of talking, too much of walking, too much sleeping, or too much of anything... We always land up saying that we're sick and tired of doing that thing....

So here comes my question.....

"Does too much of love turn bitter"? When someone loves you over the moon! And takes care of you to his or her last breath, does love get bitter and do you lose interest? Question to be pondered upon.... Aren't there many of us out there who would just be praying that we have someone to love us and care for us all the time?

Friday, November 30, 2007

When you begin to notice... rather than just look

You know there's this sudden phase in your life... When you feel so uncomfortable and uneasy.... Not knowing what exactly is wrong.... But you do know that there is something wrong.... This phase in which your mobile never rings!

Yes, over the past few days, my mobile hardly ever rings or beeps or does anything at all... And there are certain times when I do feel awkward... Keep taking my phone to check if anyone has messaged me or has tried to call me and I haven't picked up... Stuff like that.... But much later... as I actually walk around the place... I find that there are so many things I want to think off... there are so many thoughts that need clarity... and so many things that come to your attention... Right from the time I walk out of my house in the morning... I tend to look at things with more detail. I see that the area I live in is a nice area... there seem to be a lot of nice people around, I see that Chennai has got a lot of new buses and is started to look brighter... The roads have changed drastically over the past few years and the drive on OMR actually feels so "Non-Chennai".

At work, I begin to notice that there are a lot of nice people around me and that when I leave, I will miss this place. All the things that I have taken for granted, now has so much more meaning to me! I relish all the moments I spent here... For however many different organizations I may work in as part of my career, Infosys will always be my first company... my first job... my first set of "work-friends". And, for sure I have had one hell of a journey from the first day I joined for work with Infy.

June 19th 2006 : The day it all began. My folks dropped me at Infosys Mysore. I was so over-whelmed with the mere size and look of the campus. I felt like I was in a different country - what with the perfect landscaping, roads and other facilities. I hardly knew anyone for the first week or so.... Just a few people from college, who I was never close to earlier... But now that I didn't know anyone, was moving with them.... But as my training began, within the first one week, I realised I had found an amazing set of friends and I would never be lonely in this campus... The campus was so beautiful, especially in those evening times. It would look so romantic, and I would wish I had a girlfriend with me at that place. It sure would have been the best thing! But then, being without one sure does have its advantages too! :) And as days went by, I realised that I loved the place and it was so much fun, despite the hectic schedules... We had to study for hours and had exams every other day. It became so much a part of life and we were always on our feet... But we found all the time we needed to have our fun.. I liked the place so much that I decided to stay on in Mysore. And so I was posted in Mysore.

The house hunt at Mysore: Not exactly a mouse hunt... but it sure was a comic story of sorts. I decided to stay with another two of my friends from my training batch in a house. We began hunting for houses. Wherever we went, we carried this tag of being an Infoscion - which to us meant pride, but to the locals meant "rich". So basically there was an immediate 50% hike in the rate of anything if we didn't know the local language, or even worse if we had our Infy ID card clipped on! But despite all this, we found the place to me cheaper than Chennai as Mysore isn't all that big a place. We found a wonderful 3 bedroom appartment, which must have been among the poshest that Mysore could offer. I loved the place the moment I saw it. The owner was ok with us being "bachelors". Do they expect us to get married just to find a house!! :) Marriage isn't that simple is it? Anyways, we had to find a place before the end of that day, as it was our last day that we had accomodation on campus. So we paid this guy the advance and packed our bags. Sometime around 6 in the evening, we take our bags and go over to the appartment complex. As we move our luggage(we had a lot of it) upstairs, we see the secretary of the building and other "association" members stand in front of our appartment refusing to let us get into the appartment! It seems they have some rule in that building stating that bachelors would not be allowed! Well here it begins again.... The marriage game! For Christ's sake... weren't these people unmarried at any time... Or were they born married to someone! We tried doing out bit at negotiating but nothing worked. These people even refused to let us stay there for a night. We finally convinced them to take care of our luggage. So we were stranded without a place to stay.... Walking around trying to figure out what to do! The next day we spoke to this owner and he threw a fit saying he would take the association to court and stuff like that... All we wanted was a place to stay.... And then he tells us that we could stay in another 2 bedroom appartment of his for a few days till he sorts out this problem he had.... So we move to another appartment.... This was much cheaper... was a new appartment... We liked this a lot too... More so as it was more economical... We spent little short of one month in this appartment before the people in the building always seemed to have a problem with everything we did... Right into the amount of water we were using for a bath! So we searched for other places and finally found an independent house with 3 bedrooms that was far cheaper than this place..... We moved... and that was where we stayed henceforth... The things we did at this place... All the noise we made disturbed no one... The late nights on our own terrace.... The small home-made parties.... Was one hell of an amazing life... Add to that, the fact that I was on bench( for not IT people: without a project - jobless with pay), and this was a honeymoon period of my life... Was getting paid good money, without doing any real work! I watched so many movies, went to so many restaurants... and basically had a ball of a time!

Back to Chennai: By this time, my life had changed in many ways....For reasons very important to me, I had to get back to Chennai. It brought back memories from the past... and drove me towards my future... This city would always be home to me... Would always welcome me and keep me smiling.... The first few weeks after I returned, I found things very difficult. For one, I was put into a project right at the beginning.... Moreover I had to stay late hours at office... It was like a total shift for me.... Apart from that the climate was getting to me... It was boiling upwards of 30 degrees on the mercury and I found it difficult stepping outdoors even for a few minutes. Apart from these differences, I found that my circle of friends had shrunk drastically.... All the people I once knew were in different parts of the world or busy with their lives.... At this point, I came to understand what many of my older friends had told me. Once you begin to work, your circle closes in... and then you choose to spend the free time you have wisely with the people whose company you enjoy the most... And hence the circle closes in and at times you feel like you're really getting older and older.. It becomes more difficult to meet new people and make new friends... And so you got to hold on to your existing friends!! Damn... life for sure is one viscious circle!

Today: I'm back in Chennai..... feeling pretty lonely... Lots of things happening in life that I don't understand... Its like a repeat of things I dint wanna ever be a part of again... And it makes me think of what I'm doing with my life and my decisions. Am I just being stupid and stuck somewhere in a dream? When will i get down. But as I keep moving away/towards the truth, I begin to notice a lot more of the things around me. Everything has an essence and all the happenings around become highlighted. Is this an indication of reality hitting me? That I don't know.... Will have to wait and watch how things go over the next few months or possibly over the next few years.... But trust for sure is getting wiped out... going with the wind... and a few silly actions that I can only blame on immaturity. And I forgive... Is it because I am weak... or is it because I am caring and loving? Whatever the answer is, it makes me look bad... And all this while I never did care coz I thought all the lil things I did would be noticed and I would be cared and loved for. Now, I'm having second thoughts. And I did not bring it on..... Wonder where this road's gonna leave me over the next few months. I just hope I do the right thing....

Thursday, October 25, 2007


You know there's this phase of your life when all the things that matter most to you come crashing onto you at the same time.....And you don't know how to handle things...Even if you know how to handle... you really don't know what you're supposed to be looking at first!! When things come hitting you really hard.... and at the most crucial phase of your life....

Maybe I look at things differently... but however I try to look at it in any other way... I am not able to really comprehend the situation... Is it so difficult to give up a few things in life for the person you love?? Always gonna be a question mark.... I've always known what are the important things in life... and have been able to put aside a few things to go on with the more important things... But when you don't see that happening around you... I guess you just feel that the fire has died down... That fire that came out of understanding a world without the person you care for from inside... That fire that would take you into a different realm... When that dies down... Ppl think that they are invincible and take a lot of things for granted... But what to do... I don't seem to know how to handle any of this.... It hurts and pains to see the way things are happening in front of my life... but then like I always believe its taken two hands to clap... And i don't see a probable and possible life without the person I love... And for sure, life has become a lot simpler and easier when the person you love is around you.... But at what cost... Being humiliated??? In a very subtle way off course... but humiliation is humiliation....

And apart from this so many other things hitting onto me really hard.... My future... Where I'm gonna be a few years down the line... how i'm gonna be able to support my family without my father or family's help... Always wanted to be someone independently and not just fall back to what has landed upon me.. That could just be a cushion or a pillow... But its us who have gotta find a life for ourself... But when all of these different things come and hit you at the same time... you're handicapped... and feel like leaving everything and just lying down without any hope or belief in anything.....

And at this stage when you feel the support you had was falling... And you try to look around for a life that can make you feel like you mean something in it... Maybe its life's way of telling me to do something... Just wish I'd know what it was that I'm supposed to be doing... Coz i really don't understand now... I'm clear with what I want... But am not sure of how to get there.... And desperation is leading me to give up on certain core values I believe in... I guess I have to start planning the way I survive or live through this... Its time I start being selfish and think of myself... Just don't know whether I can survive this holocaust or am I being deceived... And whether this is what I want for myself..... I need help... need my friends... need to be understood .... Don't know if i wanna just run away from everything... And i have never been able to issue an ultimatum... I see hope for myself only with my family.... I think that's the way I'm gonna look... because... family is never ever gonna turn its back on me despite what I do or say.... When the time comes to say goodbye and part... will I be able to do that without anyone else in my life??? Without anything... without a pillar or without a hand to hold me...That's scaring me more and more as the days go by.... And the love of my life... seems to be very certain bout certain things in her life... and so its just me being unsure... and me fighting this battle all alone....Just me and the rest of the world.... Where is my army... Where is my general? Am i totally cornered???

Friday, September 14, 2007

A diary re-opened: Times of need

You know how it is to open a diary which you left hidden in the deepest of closets thinking you never need it again....

Why never need it again?? Because you felt that a person was there to share everything and nothing ever be private and emotions and trust ruled over the intimacy in your lives. Why let out all feelings and happenings outside of this bond... And so this diary - my blog remained closed over the past months.

Its open again.... And why? There are many questions and even more probable answers. But in the end, the story ends with trust....

What exactly is love and trust? Love has this peculiar ability to lock all other feelings and emotions somewhere far away and blind you to the different colours around... It shows you what it wants you to see, it makes you feel what it wants you to feel... and basically builds a fantasy world around you.... But is this just love.... Maybe love goes beyond.... What happens when over a period of time, the person you look into is not just the bright colours and you begin to look beyond.... This is where trust comes into the picture.... Love exists wrapped around trust and they go on together to take one far away into new horizons....That's how we see couples married together for years and still so much into each other...

But what happens when trust is shattered... And hell breaks loose... Emotions cloud judgement... Decisions seemingly rational at that time look lame at another point.... And then the skies begin to come down.... To thrust upon us an agony and pain that can never be felt other-wise. No cures, no way out.... Just locked into the pain... the realisation that this could be an endless tunnel and there will never be any light.....

Words flowing without a slight thought.... Double-edged swords... Not leaving the smallest of space to hold on to one's breath.... Anger does off course bring out the worst of one's vocabulary and one's mind... But when things are said that are far into questioning one's honesty and one's faithfulness.... Is this a way of trying not to feel guilty... finding flaws in the other person.... just to close your eyes to the mistakes we commit....

Judgement clouded, mind forcefully pushing those droplets out of vision.... thus blinding every sensory perception.... Availabilty making the core of the relationship.... the further you are the closer you are... When you are exclusive... things go to the border of being taken for granted... and the respect you need no longer is available...

Forgiveness is misunderstood for weakness and tears are misunderstood for lack of sexuality... What is the world coming to? Is true romance dead? Is true love a misconception? Is there no hope for sacrifice in this world anymore.....

A bouquet of red roses - Does it actually mean anything to the girls of today?
Going out of the way to help - Is that what is expected in a relationship? How about some appreciation?
Making a sacrifice - Does that mean the person's supposed to do all of that to show he/she's in love?

Where did the days of just forgiving, forgetting, kissing and making up go? When did the age of punishment in relationships start? When did making a small mistake go all the way to the point of bringing in fear and insecurity into a relationship....

Flaws which normally hidden by smiles and love.... shine bright in times of trouble... And how things are managed then make for a good foundation in a relationship.... bailing out every time there's a problem isn't the only solution.... Where did understanding go? Where did care, sympathy go?

All over and over... thoughts flow through my head... and my etchings could decorate the Great Wall of China.... but i'm gonna take a break now.... Need to do something to cleanse my thoughts.... Probably gonna knock a few years of my age...Try to change into someone I am not!!
Well people who know me well are gonna be saying, he always says this, but never does change... And i stand by that... I will not change... thought i am going to make an effort.... I cannot be this person who doesn't make sacrifices in the name of love... who tries to do things to make every moment special.... Now, if prayers are to be answered and if things are gonna work.... I will look up and smile.... waiting to see what god has in store for me....

Wednesday, July 18, 2007

A new Chapter.... A new beginning

Its been ages since I got down to filling anything here... But now I feel I have to describe my life as it has changed drastically.

Mysore - A life totally unparalleled by any other phase of my life! Being left with all the time in the world, giving my mind space to think about anything and everything. Movies, Games, TV, eating out, etc etc... that's all I ever did in Mysore... I was getting a salary, but didn't really have anything big to do to justify all of that. Almost a year of sitting idle doing nothing but enjoying my life. But one fine day, I decide to get back to Chennai, get back for the sake of love, for the sake of getting back with old friends, for the sake of a new life.

Chennai - I get here to be assigned a project right from the day I arrive. Within a week I was working about 10 hours a day. I hardly had the time for any of the stuff I was so used to. And in another week, I was working 12 hours a day. Off course, atleast the project I got into wasn't the kind of stuff I detested, but rather more to do with being able to communicate with people and co-ordinate with people. So that calls for some consolation. But the person I got here for has been so busy that we actually hardly get time to be with each other or speak to each other. But despite the busy lives we have, I feel we have got to be so much closer and our relationship has gone to a totally new level.

One decision - And life can change beyond imagination. Who would think, I, of all people would sit in office for 12 hours a day! I find it difficult to believe, but yes its true. And the best part is, its not as bad as I thought it would be. Off course I found it difficult in the beginning - the heat, the working hours, getting up early in the morning, getting back late, not being able to watch at least a movie a day and so many other things! But now its fine, I have something to keep my mind occupied and it isn't running wild with crazy ideas. I am more confident of who I am. I am trying to be a role model for the people around me. Holding on to a few of my emotions which other wise weren't really helping me!

Change - Takes time to set in... but for sure is inevitable. I'm hoping sooner than later, I get to be able to take the next big step in my life. I know what I want and I'm hoping it happens pretty soon. I just realised I'm all ready to take the big step.

Friday, April 27, 2007

Where are you, my angel?

How very hurting can life get? When all the things you stood strong for… you believed in… and loved… came crashing on you from all sides… When all the pillars and supporting material caved in… When you just had to hold on to only yourself… when the little bit of happiness you found and tried to give just came back hitting you hard realizing that you are just a mere mortal… a mere human being… When you sacrifice just for love… When you are willing to do all to keep the flame burning… even with the wind and the rain just fighting with each other to take your flame away… And they leave you alone only when they realize that they’re going to have to take you first before they can go anywhere near the light your flame shines….

Dejection can just be an understatement and life can just be so different from what you try to understand of it. Where tears no more mean anything… and when feelings don’t help in getting you where you want. Helplessness just feeding more pain into the open wounds… when you feel that there is nothing that you want more, than to just live… To just be given a way to live… just a way to breathe… just a way to try to understand… just someone to believe in…. to have faith in something… to be able to see beyond the small trees… to be able to fly with the birds… to be able to fall asleep on the clouds….

I know there’s someone up there listening to me as I plead… or do I convince myself there is someone…. I know there’s something in this life for me… but can’t it just be what I want and can’t it just be made into something simpler…. How can words come out to mean something? How can words ever be enough to make someone understand the things you want and the things you feel? What can be given and what can be said… Someone has got to help out here… If there’s my angel listening somewhere… Please show me the way… I don’t even need a hand…. I just need the light.

Wednesday, March 28, 2007


Ever been through dat phase of ure life where you don't know wat's gonna happen and wat lies ahead.... I repeatedly seem to be passing through this phase... And as I grow older I have realised that its left to me to be able to handle it... I am seemingly more and more alone when I think. When I first finished school and I had to get into a good college, off course I was nervous and tensed... but more because I wanted to live up to my parents expectations and stuff like dat.... I just worked and let my parents worry for me..... I did get into a good college... Then I was again in this phase when I was finishing college...Worrying about what to do next... and this time it was more on my shoulders... My parents were there for support, but deep down inside me I knew that it had to be my decision and I had to decide what I wanted to do with my life......It was difficult... i was not used to handling all that pressure.... But then I got through and today I am working for a very good company.... though i really don't know if I'm enjoying my job today.... (Will get down to that in some other post probably)...

Today i am again worried about where things are going... Have again come to another cross-road... Don't know which direction I have to take. So much pressure and this time I feel like I'm all alone... There are so many things that I cannot speak to them about at this moment...
I don't know what is gonna happen few years down the line... Where am I gonna be.... I have to study further... That i know for sure...But I've always been responsible only for myself....Now, I also am responsible for this person whose so special and means so much to me in my life!! Its up to me to be courageous for the two of us... We both know how we want life to be for us and we're sure we want to be together... but its upto me now to handle things the way it should be... think ten times before taking a small step... and step by step... gotta reach where we want to be...Want the rest of our lives to be perfect for us... So this is going to take a lot of thinking and planning... This time its mostly that I'm alone thinking and working things out... Off course she's there with me to support me and prod me on.... but have always thought of her as my lil kid.... Don't want to put too much pressure on her... she wouldn't be able to take it.... And in the midst of all this get so many things running in my head and sometimes I begin to think that life isn't being fair to me.... I know i'm being selfish and stupid thinking like that... For instance... Life showed me the path to her... and that is something that has made everything so perfect for me... Opened my eyes to a whole new dimension of loving and caring.... I just want everything to be perfect for us...

I just hope that everything goes on for the best and I'm able to convince everyone around me... atleast the people who need to be convinced; that this is how life should be and this is how I want to live my life... And if they really do want me to be happy, then this is what they need to do for me! Back at the cross-roads.... Too many directions and too few choices.....

But despite all the braveness I try to portray... Something in me has cracked and the strong wall I built around me sometime back is trying to fall.... Need help rebuilding it... Just want to be strong so badly and I always land up breaking up.... Not used to all this pressure.... I have to study also... Coz where I am now is not enough... I have to be in a position to be able to be well placed in life.... To give my family all that we need... Should not have to depend on my parents for all of this....

Wednesday, March 14, 2007

Making our Paradise

Would you be there to smile at me every day,
Would we be together to see the sun everyday.
Would you choose to go with your heart.
Or would you rather say goodbye and part?

Would you rather leave behind all the thoughts?
Or would you like to stay to build those thoughts?
Would you rather feel my hands slipping away?
Or would you rather hold them through the sway?

All I want to do is hold you all my life,
I can’t even think of another way.
I wouldn’t know where to hold on,
I wouldn’t be able to go too long.

I’d be totally beaten back,
Not able to find the track.
I need to know if love is pain,
Or whether its there to cover the rain.

All these tears are not just in vain,
I know there’s someone watching me in pain.
And love would be a prayer I have sent,
A life with you I’d never resent.

Would you ever feel the way I feel?
Would you ever hold me as I sleep.
Would we get to be in our dream,
Or is it going to fade away with the sleep?

Will your voice always echo in my ear?
Or is it going to take me into fear?
Every second moving closer to the fence,
Hanging on to our every last defense.

Together we will recreate the meaning of love,
Together we will hold onto all that we’re there for.
Paint the picture that we’re meant to draw,
All our colours bringing to fade everything around.

This is what is meant to be,
Don’t know how you cannot see.
Take all the courage you have,
To make this all our very own paradise.

Monday, March 12, 2007

Movie Crazy Tamil Nadu

All over the world, movies influence people and also inculcate in them a myriad of reactions and feelings. But nowhere in the world can movies actually have an impact on people than in Tamil Nadu. This can be endorsed by the fact that all the politicians who are someone in this state have all been from the film world and each one’s vote bank has been nurtured and brought up on the basis of different movies. Our people don’t just watch a movie to take time of from their busy schedule but rather movies are a part and parcel of their schedule. Queues stretching as far as ones eyes go to get a ticket for a movie on the first day is a very common sight in Chennai. In the beginning, I used to wonder why people would stand in such long queues to get a ticket on the first day, or even going to the level of buying a ticket in the “black”, when you could come back to see the very same movie about a week or even a month later very comfortably. But after I stayed in Chennai for a few years I understood that this was practically drilled into us. We were forced by society and the general public into doing being there to watch a movie on the first day. Maybe, this could be another form of social pressure or even “peer” pressure, if I may be allowed to use this term. My friends would get excited just at the thought of a movie that was going to be released even a year later. They would go to any levels to be the first to get some little bit of information on the movie, something that others didn’t know. Why? Because everyone is interested and there are hardly a handful of Tamilians who would not flutter an eye-lid when a Rajinikanth starrer or Kamal-Hassan starrer was to release!

Rajinikanth movies are really something in Tamil Nadu. A first day show of a Rajinikanth movie could cost anywhere between Rs.500 – Rs.1000 in the black, as you can be pretty sure that you wouldn’t be able to get a ticket at the counter (Blame it on the fan clubs or the influence of people with the theatre owners). So if you were just a commoner, you would have to probably buy a ticket for this cost. And there are so many people who would do anything to lay their hands on this ticket. People who hardly make enough money for a living and to support their family would be willing to spend so much money to get their hands on a ticket to their “Thalaivar’s” film!

Leaving aside the monetary factor, a movie release is more celebrated as a festival here in Tamil Nadu. With people bursting crackers, sticking posters and hanging streamers all over the towns and cities, a movie release gives people a more “understood” common reason to celebrate. It is very common to see people dancing and screaming out at theatres vehemently sure that their “demi-god” on screen can here what they have to say and will appreciate them for their loyalty and antics. Fans turn into political parties and fans turn into MLAs (ministers in the state assembly). This is how “loyalty” is rewarded in our political system (which also includes the film industry). Very simply put, there is a very thin line that divides our political system from our film industry. This line can choose to appear when it is needed and also disappear when it is not needed.

So how should our film-makers act knowing and understanding the prevailing situation. They know that every action our superstar performs on screen is going to be imitated by thousands and many are going to live the character their star plays on screen. So here comes the million-dollar question – Are our movie makers being responsible and taking movies understanding the sentiments of our people. This is highly debatable, but I choose to say that there are very few film-makers who make a movie responsibly. I understand that people are expected to act in an independent manner and are supposed to be able to think for themselves, but are our people thinking for themselves? A small illustration to drive home the above fact is smoking on-screen. Yes, I agree it does look stylish to see an actor blowing smoke in different shapes, but I personally do know many people who have taken to smoking because they have seen their favourite actor do so on screen. This is just a small illustration of the on-going situation. Movie-makers are taken away by commercial aspects of movies and resort to taking ugly scenes (like badly taken rape scenes) in order to bring crowds into the halls. They even work their way through the censor board to justify such scenes in our movies. Maybe our film-makers should concentrate more on spreading messages through their films to create social awareness on a host of reasons. You could very well argue that this would lead to boring films and “documentary-like” films, but I beg to differ. There was a certain movie in which comedian Vivek focused all of his comedy scenes in the movie on trying to make people understand that many of their customary practices were mostly without rationale. The comedy track was appreciated and enjoyed by all at the same time trying to tell people to think of many of the practices they were following just because their fore-fathers told them to do so!

Only in Tamil Nadu, can a movie be the cause of calling an assembly session, the cost of a movie ticket be cause of state-wide headlines and feuds between fans extend beyond to reach political heights. Only in Tamil Nadu, can actors take on politicians openly in the public, can actors run a three-hour advertisement for himself to create an entry point into his political career and most amusingly can an actor copyright his on-screen behavioral patterns. This is the state where real life isn’t portrayed in movies, but rather scenes from movies and dialogues reflect on a person’s behavioral habits and character. Drama extends to reality and reality rises beyond the galaxy creating super stars who go even beyond to hold the reins of power.

Friday, February 16, 2007

This bliss of ours will never end.....

This bliss of ours will never end…..

Through the tears and the pain,
In the heat and the rain.
With the smiles and the laughter,
Holding hands walking together.

Baby, you’re the one for me,
Always together we’re meant to be.
The best in us for the world to see,
Hold my hands, Our love will breathe.

The oneness that our hearts share,
Despite the differences we have.
This infinite love that I bear,
Tells stories without any compare.

I wish I had you in my arms,
I wish I could just prolongue this trance.
The distance between vanishing before my eyes.
This journey I travel to hold my prize.

The moments that you speak silence,
The volumes that I hear just then.
Keeps my heart beating for still another moment,
The brutality of miles submerging into obliviousness.

In the trees I hear your name,
In the breeze, I see your face.
On my walls, I imagine a million portraits.
In my ears, I feel you whispering,
Close my eyes, You stand before me,
Falling down, your lap comes beneath,
Miss a step and you pull me up,
Blinded by all, you give me sight.

For you my love, I make this pledge,
Till the breath ends, together we’ll tread.
In this journey and the next,
This bliss of ours will never end.

To a really special person......

For you my love, I need no special day,
I needn't confess my love in a million ways.
Never need to express the deepest of feelings,
Love coming out in a thousand different meanings.

But I still would do all of that and more,
Each and every day another new old lore.
Not many are well given a friend to love,
An Angel to take me up heavenly above.

Memories being the air keeping me breathing,
Your kiss forever will keep me yearning.
You bring a smile to my heart,
I'm sure even death can't do us apart.

Every day a new thread binding us together,
If one should break,Ten form in its wake.
And now I wish, I could wake up each morning,
To the sound of your breath onto my neck.
The warmth of your lips on my cheek,
The touch of your fingers on my skin,
And the feeling of our hearts beating as one.

Every touch sends a thousand chills down my spine,
I love so much that you are mine,
I love you today as from the start,
I promise to love you forever with all of my heart.

Saturday, January 13, 2007

Have we lost our privacy?

If you happen to live in a metro or even a big town, just take a walk outside on the roads. What do you see? For sure, you would see at least seven out of ten people speaking on their mobile phones! This is the scenario today- even auto rickshaw drivers or labourers have one in their pocket. Such is the impact of mobile communication. India is known to be among the nations having the cheapest mobile tariffs in the world. This may be one of the reasons. What bothers me is the fact that we have lost our lives to our phones! We need to speak to someone every now and then. And if we don’t need to do that, someone needs to speak to us every now and then!

Unknowingly, we have lost every last bit of privacy that we had. We may stay in the most secluded of places but like the Hutch advertisement very sweetly puts across “Wherever you go, our network follows you”. Well that’s what’s happening to each and every one of us. Off course the world is getting closer and the concept of a global village has arrived, but think of the cons of such a situation. Where are the philosophers and thinkers? You may argue saying that “We do have the freedom to switch our phones off”. But when would we do something like that. Even if we were to do something like that it would probably be because we’ve fought with someone and we don’t want to talk to them! And even then the urge to switch on the mobile would conquer or emotions more often sooner than later.

People call us all the time and say “Hello, How have you been? I’ve missed you so much.” Well to think of it, do we actually give people a chance to miss us? How did our parents or rather grand parents live? There weren’t any mobile phones then. Off course we could always make a call from a landline when we needed to. I don’t think any of our mobiles stay quiet without receiving a call or atleast a message every hour. And if someone’s phone stops working for a day or two, all hell breaks loose. People call to ask whether everything is alright and so many such things.

I’ve actually wondered at many an instance as to whether I would be able to stay without a phone for a considerable period of time. I’ve tried it once and failed miserably. There’s this urge to reach out for my phone and message someone. I then realized that we do message people without any real considerable message to pass on!

“Hey man. Wat U Up2?”


“Wat’s up?”

Or even

“Good Morning”

What the hell are we getting to? Are we becoming slave to technology? That is one other cause for concern. I guess if we didn’t have our phones, we’d fine some other way of keeping ourselves busy and there’s a 70% chance that it would be something more productive. So now we no longer have any such thing as a “Private Life” and we’re becoming slave to technology. Is this for the good?????

Oops… Am getting a call… Gotta go…. Give it some thought people……

P.S: My Spanish post is still underway... just wasn't in the mood to complete it and thought i'd put something else in here!